Disappointed

I am so disappointed in everything.
I always place you on the top above everything else
but in your heart i am always
the last.
Everything else before me, i think this is your slogan.
I cancel family outing just to be with you
I cancel friend's date just to be with you
I don't turn up for cousin's birthday just to stay with you longer.
But i don't think you appreciate anything.
I always turn up for your parent's birthday.
I am always there for your relatives celebrations.
:(
I tried to look at the bright side.
It just doesn't seems to work
I don't wan to act happy anymore
When i am not.
Its bleeding inside
but you don't see it.
From now on, i will try.
Try not to think of you so often.
Until one day when we don't even bother about each other.
Then that's the day
Our beautiful fairy tale end.
Just like that.
Don't ever take pity on me because i don't need it.
Sylvia, i should have been tougher just like you.
I wish i were.